Welcome to the True Campaign!

Saturday, March 29, 2008 - Comments 1

Wow, we’re so glad you’re here at our site, reading this message! This has been a true labor of love (no pun intended), and we’re excited to finally have things up and running.

I am one-half of the team that you’ll hear from most often. My cohort is Travis Stewart. He’s a counselor, a dad, and a pretty good guy. I’m sure you’ll hear more from him soon. Plus, we’ll have guest bloggers from time to time – people who are on a journey toward replacing lies with truth in their own lives. Until then, here’s a little of my story…

When I was twenty-seven, I walked into my primary care physician’s office and made a confession. “My dad thinks I have an eating disorder,” I said, a little tentatively. I felt kind of silly being there. For one thing, I was a successful woman with an exciting job in the music business, a great husband, and what I considered to be the ‘perfect sized’ body.

Plus, I knew enough about eating disorders to know that I didn’t qualify for one. My mom had actually struggled with bulimia for much of my life, and while I had ‘flirted’ with various forms of disordered eating in college (including brief stints when I would have technically met criteria for anorexia, bulimia, and binge eating disorder), by the time I was sitting in that doctor’s office I had been doing nothing more ‘disordered’ than just watching what I ate.

Ok, watching it a little carefully.

OK, a little over-carefully.

Like most stories, mine is long, and books, not blogs, are the best places for long stories. But what I can tell you is that I soon came to realize that my obsession with food and thinness had taken over my life. I can also tell you that now, almost ten years later, I no longer live that way.

That’s not to say I don’t still struggle with body image and, more foundationally, self-image. In fact, that’s part of why I’m so passionate about this campaign – I am personally on a quest to calm the voices that scream into my head that I’m not good enough, not pretty enough, not young enough, and so on.

If you’re here, you’ve probably heard the voices too. And maybe, like me, you’re getting tired of listening to them. That’s good. We can fight them together.

This site is a great place to start. Add your name to the log; your passion to the cause. Together, we really can make a difference.

Looking forward…

Constance

Constance Rhodes
Founder, FINDINGbalance
Author, Life Inside the Thin Cage
TRUE Campaigner (for life!)

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A Man's Perspective
Travis Stewart
True Campaign Team Member

OK, let’s just get it out in the open: I’m a guy. A man, a male, a fellow...dude, bloke, hombre…
 
There. I said it. 
 
And I say it because if you haven’t already thought it, you will: “What is a guy doing being a part of a campaign about women’s eating issues and body image?” 
 
Let me tell you. 
 
Reason #1
For the past five years I have worked at Remuda Ranch, one of the world’s leading treatment centers for eating disorders. During that time I interacted with hundreds of women and girls whose lives were crumbling and literally wasting away because of their struggles. 59 of these women’s lives were momentarily entrusted to me and the team of other professionals at Remuda. 
 
As I sat with these young ladies in my office, I saw past the “diagnosis” and connected with the incredibly unique and valuable individuals that they were. And as I listened to them tell me how “fat” they were, or as they wept because the only affirmation they had ever had from a male was about their appearance, my heart began to break. 
 
Reason #2
I’m a part of the problem. Eating disorders, chronic dieting and self-hatred are complicated issues, but we cannot ignore the influence that men have had on these problems.
 
Throughout history, men have undervalued and damaged the dignity of women. They have ignored the character and inner qualities of women while exploiting her body, whether by limiting her influence to physical tasks or outright sexual abuse.
 
As a man, I’m part of this. I’ve grown up in, and been an active participant of a culture that still does this. I’ve believed the lies about a woman’s value and beauty. I’ve ignored women whom I saw as unattractive and I’ve placed higher value on women because of their physical beauty. 
 
As a therapist I discovered that I can also be a “good man.” With the girls I treated, I learned that my voice had healing power as I spoke true words into their lives about their character and worth. As a man, I realize I can be a part of change, and of calling other men to do the same.
 
Reason #3
I’m married and I have children. Even after 16 years of marriage I’m still learning things about my wife, Susan, and I’m learning that body image issues don’t go away. My wife still needs to know she is lovely, even more so than on the day we wed.
 
My daughter, Laura, is 10. She’s on the verge of being a teenager, dating, and puberty. She’s going to be thrown into the fire in the next several years and I want her to be prepared. 
 
Finally, I have a 8 year-old son, Spencer. What kind of man will he grow up to be? How will he treat women? Can he be a part of changing culture and challenging cultural ideals of beauty and identity? I hope so.
 
I’m honored to be part of the True Campaign. I hope you, too, will allow me to speak healing words into your life.
 
Travis Stewart
Professional Counselor
Remuda Ranch
True Campaign Team